Steel on Steel

Today I am writing this post on behalf of Derek and myself...in memory of and in honor to our friend Greg Makcen.

It was on this date four years ago that our hearts were deeply grieved and sorrowful to learn that Greg had died. Even though he had been battling a mysterious illness for a time, it still seemed unthinkable that someone so exuberant and full of life would indeed be taken from us. The shock was great.

Death has been a part of my life almost since I can remember. I know, that sounds like a bizarre statement. But most of you know that my dad has worked in the Funeral 'business' for many years. His very livelihood counts on the certainty of death. I have also been acquainted with grief through the loss of loved ones, and friends, some of which were so young to die, by all earthly standards. I guess it is because of this familiarity that I came early on in life to deplore the platitudes and cliches that come along with grief. Not because I think people don't mean well; only that hearing once again that "God needed another flower for His garden, or another 'angel' for His choir" brings me no comfort at all; indeed, it flies in the very face of who I believe God to be. Neither a selfish gardener, nor Choral director. Still, the death of this friend was very hard to accept; it was painful.

But I have digressed. I wanted to share some thoughts about who Greg Makcen was to us. Ten years ago, he was a total stranger! Then we received a call to come and be part of his pastoral staff in the capacity of Music Ministry. When we accepted this call, to join Bro. Greg and his family there in Tuscaloosa, we were new to full-time ministry. And Greg was relatively new to having a "team" to work with. What an adjustment of learning, growing, stretching, accepting, mentoring, leading, and following we encountered! As we felt our way through developing a common philosophy of ministry, there were times of major "discussion" that occurred! Boy, did we go 'round and 'round sometimes (you know, in the sanctified sense :) ) There are a lot of people...even those in places of ministry across the CHM and church world at large...who cannot or will not sustain their friendships through these times of 'sharpening each other like steel on steel.' I guess the greatest thing about our relationship and friendship with Bro. Greg was that it only became stronger and deeper with time. We feel like we grew as people and as Christians for having known him. I'm especially glad that we went back for a visit and enjoyed some precious fellowship together just a few weeks before he died. In our minds, Greg didn't leave behind a legacy that he was this perfect, saintly, have-it-all-together man, but his humanity and his ability to correct course and have a teachable spirit are a HUGE example to us. It is no trite thing when I say that the impact that Greg Makcen left on us was Jurassic in size. The way he viewed people and his intense passion for "right living" (as he would say), and whole-hearted Service to God, has left a mark on our lives and we are forever grateful.


Our memories of our time in Alabama are exceedingly precious to us now. So many fun games played around the table, and stories shared. Greg loved tall tales :)
We miss him, and look forward to seeing him again someday in Heaven. It will be interesting to find out if Greg will really be able to sing now that he's crossed to the other side. Lord knows, he drove us nuts in this world wishing that he could!!!
And, if there's Skip-Bo in Heaven, I fully plan to say "Skip Bro. Greg", just once more...for old times' sake!
We have often laughed at the thought of Greg slipping in to sit on the back pew during his own funeral service. He would have gotten such a kick out of it; all the accolades and well-known preachers on the platform. He would have loved every minute of it!


So, here's to you, Bro. Greg: our friend, our Pastor, co-worker, neighbor, and teacher of hard truths. You are Missed!

I know I have shamelessly used my blog today to vent some very personal thoughts and reflections. I hope you'll forgive it, and understand that this was good therapy. When I'm tempted to feel sorrowful for Greg that his full and exciting life was cut short, Derek reminds me: don't feel sorry for Greg! Feel sorry for us! His journey is over; no more pain, sickness, temptation or trouble. He's arrived: now it behooves us to do the same.

One lucky girl.....

I am one lucky girl. I have a great Dad, and it is a privilege to honor him on Father's Day.

My childhood memories are riddled with fond recollections of my Dad: Nights looking through the telescope to view the beautiful Florida sky; Us three kids running out every afternoon to greet him when he came home from work, like he was ROYALTY! Sunday afternoon rides on the back of his motorcycle (bet that's a little known fact!), excursions to various locations delivering precious 'cargo' to their intended destinations. (trying to think of a delicate way to put that, for those of you who know my dad's occupation!). I remember how funny it was that my friends knew I believed that my Dad could do anything (he CAN), and how I tried to not wound my fiance's ego over that issue! I remember what a BIG kick my Dad got over doing his own special Christmas shopping for my Mom every year. And how he tormented her with his clever clues! I remember that I still kissed his cheek before leaving for school every morning, even all through high school. (Once, another student whose relationship with their parents was troubled, saw me do that before I got out of the car. He expressed his amazement at that close of a relationship with your Dad. It broke my heart.)

I also remember the famous Hollingsworth "look of death" that would stop me in my tracks. Sure wish I could adequately emulate that for my kids! I remember the worst spanking I ever got over that hideous Irish Stew, for my dad insisted that we clean our plates at dinner. I remember how HARD he made my poor husband work for his approval. (of course, now Derek says he'll probably be even worse than my dad was! Funny how that works!)



Today, my Dad is still a wonderful father to me; a wonderful father-in-law to Derek, and their relationship is GREAT!; and he is a most excellent Poppa to my kids, and they love him dearly.....
It's so cliche' to say, "My dad has always been there for me." But I don't know any better way to say it, because in my case, it is exceedingly TRUE. Last Father's Day I called my dad and thanked him for the legacy, for I was also remembering my Grandpa who's gone on to Heaven now. He left a godly legacy for his kids and grandkids, and I thanked my dad for doing the same.


As most of you know, our new little guy's name is Reagan Abbott. Reagan for the high esteem in which we hold our 40th president. And ABBOTT, a Hebrew name meaning "father". We chose this in a small way to honor both my Dad and Derek's Dad. We love and honor them both. I am very sad to say that when looking for a picture of just me and my dad together, all I could find was this one of him with me in the operating room after Reagan's birth, along with a few others of him with me in the hospital at one of our many(!) birth occasions! I was so glad to have him there for that important occasion. And he even prayed for the doctor and nurses before they began the c-section. However, I do plan to remedy this problem of lacking pictures tomorrow! Inexcusable!

My Dad is still the "go-to" guy for this whole family. Hard to say how we'd function without him. I'm so glad he's in my life.

I would say that I'm one lucky girl, but perhaps I am just considerably BLESSED...

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I would like to take the time to do something that in a few years my kids will do for themselves. I want to honor my husband as the father of my children. He is a loving, playful, involved father. My children are blessed to have him and they celebrate him like the hero he is. I love you, Babe. Happy Father's Day!