Psalm 86:15 But you, O Lord, are a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness.
God is so good isn't He? He continues to reach out to mankind. His Spirit still strives with us and draws us. He hasn't repented that He made us, or thrown us out with the garbage. What a miracle that is! He loves us! He loves us in ways that we cannot even begin to understand, to explain, and in many cases to even accept. I know that many times I have "head knowledge" of this love, but when I truly try to realize the implications that He would love ME, so unworthy and needy and messed up as I am....what a revelation!! It never grows old!!
Derek and I were talking about it the other day. That we come to Him with our burdens, our problems, and our self-made messes so many times and we're just almost embarrassed to say..."ummmm, God? Lord? We're here AGAIN." Because truth is, even though we understand a parent's love (and that's about as close as I come to understanding God's interaction with us), we are still so HUMAN. And human beings just get plain 'ol fed UP. If I was God, I would have been sick of me so long ago. Long about the time I was 14 or 15, I imagine. Why He still wants me and loves me is a mystery. That He would use me in my brokenness and failings to represent His love to others, that He would trust me to be His hands and feet...EVER....is a humbling proposition.
In recent years, we've had to deal with some pretty ugly behaviors and just old fashioned meanness in some of our ministry endeavors. My personality rises up and rails against the "injustice" of it, and I want to take action and seek vindication. That is a part of my natural make-up that I have to strive with and bring under submission to the attitude of Jesus Himself. (that little tidbit was offered in a moment of sheer honesty and transparency. no extra charge.) Meanwhile, God uses my husband as an example of Christ-like love and attitude and I marvel at how he surrenders his thoughts, feelings, and "rights" in obedience to this call. I am blessed to have a man like that as the Spiritual head of this home. On one particular day when things were really getting to us, and my defenses were up, Derek shared with me what God had shown him during his private time of prayer and seeking. It was these words from Luke 6:35:
"But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in
return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most
High; for GOD HIMSELF is kind to ungrateful and evil men."
Since that time, this verse has been the banner that we have tried to live under. When you think of all that God sees, hears, and knows about depraved humanity, and yet He still chooses to be KIND, wow!! I admit that I fail at this standard more than I succeed, but it is the ultimate example. God is faithful to continue to hone that desire for His Spirit within me.
I don't know who this post is for this afternoon. I know I can't explain it or make it make sense to you, but I can promise you that the God of all creation loves you with an everlasting love.
We can't earn it, but we can let Him bring about beauty from the shriveled state of our twisted minds, and we can learn to walk in that Love, day by day. And what's more, we can walk worthy of the great Love wherewith He loved US!